THE CRINGE-WORTHY INTERNET THREAD

[vancleef]

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That's what you get when you fuck with your customer base. Keep it true and honor those that have been loyal and most of the time they will be loyal back. Start fucking with them and they will start saying "Fuck you" and leave.

Business 101. It's something like 10 times more expensive to bring in new customers than it is to keep ahold of existing ones.

The commentator in Kendo's video above used an interesting phrase that I always thought was the case. He said something, like, "10 percent don't care, 30 percent will immediately leave the minute you bring any politics into it, 30 percent will leave because they support the other side and 30 percent will agree with you." Which leaves you with, best case scenario, 40% of your previous customer base.

And that is what's known as "fucking retarded".

[ritualclarity]

12 hours ago, vancleef said:

Business 101. It's something like 10 times more expensive to bring in new customers than it is to keep ahold of existing ones.

The commentator in Kendo's video above used an interesting phrase that I always thought was the case. He said something, like, "10 percent don't care, 30 percent will immediately leave the minute you bring any politics into it, 30 percent will leave because they support the other side and 30 percent will agree with you." Which leaves you with, best case scenario, 40% of your previous customer base.

And that is what's known as "fucking retarded".

Also, if you do something good, people will tell 3~5 people... you do something bad, they will tell 10~20 people.  Fucking your customers not only pisses off those that were loyal but costs you potential future customers as well. Making that cost to get customers even higher.

Stating the fucking obvious.. (you don't like something produced, don't buy it) is also calling your customers stupid (indirectly) Make what you want to make. Accept the results.  Star Wars went down that path with their recent movies... I watched some, but they just stated going off the rails and I just stopped. haven't even watched the reviews.  Perhaps, if someone I can trust mentions that they went back to the old forumla I'd might check it again, until then, do what the fuck you want. I won't be a part of it. I suspect many others will take the same path. Most that grew up on the stories and are loyal fans.  Same with Cyberpunk. I wouldn't have bought it as recent changes in management and comments and leaks lead to the conclusion they were drinking the SJW Kool-aid. I wouldn't have a copy now if wasn't for someone being so kind and thinking that was right up my alley and getting it for a gift.  They are right, the "Advertisement" were right up my alley, their promises were right up my alley. Basically, the perfect game for me, exactly what I'd want to have in a game. Perfection. however, they didn't deliver. In this case, they (CD Project Red) had the talent and skills in house with the Witcher releases but lost it when they changed upper management and forced many of the employees to move elsewhere. Lost of great talent and serious mismanagement resulted in a seriously fucked game.

[Alkpaz]

Just got this e-mail from my bank which is owned locally: 

September 28, 2021     To our Valued Customers:    As your Hometown Bank, we want our customers to know the facts, especially when it comes to developments concerning public policy affecting your financial privacy.    The Biden administration has proposed requiring all community banks and other financial institutions to report to the IRS deposit and withdrawal information for all business and personal accounts with flows of over $600, regardless of tax liability.    This indiscriminate, comprehensive bank account reporting to the IRS may soon be enacted into law in Congress and would create an unacceptable invasion of privacy. We work for our customers and our community, not the IRS. This IRS bank account profiling is intrusive and compromises your privacy. Basically, all your account transactions will be reported to IRS.    Let’s work together to spread the word about this misguided proposal. Therefore, please take a quick moment to send off a letter to your congressional representative and to Senators Cornyn and Cruz. However, if you would like a simple, quick and efficient process, simply click on the link below and enter your name and home address. A pre-written letter prepared by the American Bankers Association will populate and will be addressed to your member of congress based on your home address. A letter will also be sent to Senators Cornyn and Cruz.   Thank you for taking the time to do this.

Act Now

Sincerely,   IBC Bank

[bjornk]

So, this guy, Gallus, somehow manages to keep a journal in the Falmer language, which is a language very few people can make sense of... and the only people in Skyrim who can do that is an old elf named Calcelmo... but he doesn't translate the journal for you... instead you go and make a copy of some random script (and by the way, how you knew that there was a Falmer script written in stone in Calcelmo's lab is a mystery), presumably written in this language and presumably with its translation in a known language, like some kind of Rosetta stone... hoping that, despite the limited vocabulary used in the script, this will help you to, at least, make some sense of what was written in this journal... You then take it to a college mage, who clearly doesn't know the language and he somehow figures out some of the stuff mentioned in the journal... including some very specific proper names of people and places... okay, you may have managed to sustain your disbelief so far, which is rather commendable... but then you take the journal to a bunch of filthy thieves... one of them, this fucktard called Brynjolf, takes the journal -written in the Falmer language- and quickly reads through it in a couple of seconds and figures it all out... ... ...

You enter Markarth for the first time specifically to do the aforementioned quest... you are already sneaking and you immediately cast the invisibility spell... you immediately take the left path in order to avoid the usual "a forsworn murders some person" scene... you don't even witness the scene... you continue to sneak towards the Keep then you suddenly notice that you're being followed... by some fucktard called Eltrys, who's somehow been following you to give his fucking note, despite the fact that you're invisible... and not to mention you haven't even witnessed the event he and his bloody note is part of, and yet, he's there, following you, and mind you, it's way past midnight and you can barely see anyone in the dark... ... ...

Just a small daily selection of idiocy from the "Legendary Edition" of Bugthesda's highest selling PC game and Todd's magnum opus...

Edit: Just tried to sneak past the vigilant waiting in front of the "Abandoned House" while invisible... I suppose you can pretty much guess what happened next...

Edited September 29, 2021 by bjornk

[bjornk]

I think this, as a news item, pretty much belongs here, as the scumbags at CD Projekt / GOG is no longer worthy of separate threads IMO...

 

[endgameaddiction]

Bet if the game was $5.99 it would be a different story.

[bjornk]

Game's price is irrelevant, it's false, misleading advertisement and against their "DRM-free" policy.

Quote

At the heart of it is what some feel is the breach of GOG's main selling point: DRM-free ownership. Those familiar with 2016's Hitman will know much of the game depends upon an online connection. The question is whether GOG should be selling such a game as it works now in the first place.

https://www.eurogamer.net/articles/2021-09-25-hitman-gog-release-sparks-drm-row-review-bombing-accusation
 

Quote

DRM FREE. No activation or online connection required to play.

They apparently added the following warning later on, but it clearly is in conflict with "No online connection required to play" and is certainly misleading.

Quote

Please note: Internet connection is required to access Escalation missions, Elusive Targets or user-created Contracts. Story and bonus missions can be played offline.

https://www.gog.com/game/hitman_game_of_the_year_edition

Edited September 30, 2021 by bjornk

[bjornk]

Karliah: This is the headquarters of the Nightingales... We've come to seek the edge we need to defeat Mercer Frey.
Karliah: To hold any hope of defeating Mercer, we must have Nocturnal at our backs.

*Player reluctantly becomes Nightingale*

Player: Erm, I don't feel stronger?
Karliah: With the Skeleton Key missing from the Twilight Sepulcher, I'm afraid Mercer's seen to it that none of us can benefit from Nocturnal's gifts.

Player: WHAT!?

It's baffling how some people, clearly with double digit IQs, can get paid to create this kind of garbage.

[Nessa]

On 10/1/2021 at 10:00 AM, bjornk said:

Karliah: This is the headquarters of the Nightingales... We've come to seek the edge we need to defeat Mercer Frey.
Karliah: To hold any hope of defeating Mercer, we must have Nocturnal at our backs.

*Player reluctantly becomes Nightingale*

Player: Erm, I don't feel stronger?
Karliah: With the Skeleton Key missing from the Twilight Sepulcher, I'm afraid Mercer's seen to it that none of us can benefit from Nocturnal's gifts.

Player: WHAT!?

It's baffling how some people, clearly with double digit IQs, can get paid to create this kind of garbage.

Hah, yeah the writing was awful. A favorite of mine is Dawnguard. Especially when sitting in Fort Dawnguard. There's a point in the quest where you have to find that idiot monk priest. Poor Serana says "Where can we find a Monk priest!?" I wanted to say: "Their monastery is just a bit to the south of us in Cyrodiil." Ah Bethsoft! They don't even put in the bare minimum!!  (A monastery where you do *&#$-all even in Oblivion. )

 

Recently trying to get through FO4. To an extent, I'm avoiding most of the main plot and just trying to get strong enough for Nukaworld. But I've been quickly reminded that as bad as Skyrim is, it can get much worse. There's so much in FO4 that is just pointless. What little dialog or interaction there is with NPCs is easily broken by their garbage dialog system. For instance, say you save a couple settlers (the idea of "settlers" being named that at all should be another rant) from super muties. WELL, one of them is supposed to walk up to you and say thanks and then you can send them to one of your places to be slave labor whiny workers. Thing is, the dialog system frequently screws up. They'll walk up to you, the dialog won't "catch" and THEY walk away severing the conversation. (Before a mod that lets you barter with one key, I had to talk to vendors typically 3 times before they'd finally show the barter dialog options.)  And they didn't have a dialog made for when the player makes contact, which is dialog 101, so they walk away like the dumb whiners they are.

Here's one that I'm still laughing over. Brotherhood of Steel. First major mission after the airship shows up. You're supposed to hop on a vertibird, fly over to a fort full of muties, kill them all and land. (Then proceed to the interior.) I saved right before hopping on the vertibird. (Little did I know how important that would be!)

Try 1: I get in, fly over to the fort. Doing a pretty good job at wiping out muties with the minigun. Suddenly the pilot decides to fly.... RIGHT INTO THE SEA! Can't get out. So... reload.

Spoiler

The vertibird just kept hovering just under the water.

 

Try 2: The vertibird is gone! It's somehow warped down to the surface! I hop down there. Save. Get in. Doing pretty good, but the pilot suddenly runs right into the other vertibird helping us out, BAM! I end up blown over to that beach settlement. (In reality I think what happened was the behemoth threw two rocks that hit both vertibirds. Pretty sure there is no collision as you'll see shortly.)

Try 3: The vertibird takes off.... and goes up to the airship! OK, I warp up (via the vertibird in the airport). I materialize outside the gangway and fall to my death.

Try 4: I TCL my way up there. SAVE AGAIN. OK. Just as I hit ride... suddenly the vertibird takes off... without me. I watch it fly all the way over there and get dead. (This ended up being the save that I kept going with.)

Try 5: Lo and behold, I finally get in the stupid vertibird again! And we actually fly over to the fort. Seems to be working... suddenly vertibird 2 flies RIGHT THROUGH US, then BAM! (Again I think it was the behemoth.) Double vertibird explosion! My poor character ends up flying past the nearby Libertalia (raider boat thing) almost all the way to the manor settlement!!

Oddly enough, this was vastly more entertainment than I ever got out of any other part of the game.

[bjornk]

"Once you've helped someone, they will like you."... Toddler level ideas accompanied by toddler level writing... I've had enough of their shit just by playing Skyrim, so FO4 is where I draw the line, to keep my sanity.

[Nessa]

8 hours ago, bjornk said:

"Once you've helped someone, they will like you."... Toddler level ideas accompanied by toddler level writing... I've had enough of their shit just by playing Skyrim, so FO4 is where I draw the line, to keep my sanity.

Yeah that's the smart move. Most of you probably know about this gem but here goes for the smart ones that never will play FO4:

Found my way south of Boston. Yep, the "ghoul child in a fridge" quest. So there's this whiny ghoul kid that's....  been trapped in a fridge for 200 years. Setting aside the sanity issue, I'm sure you're thinking: "What did he eat!?" Well no worries, the writers thought of that! Not by asking the kid, oh no. That would mean a functioning dialog system. Instead, some weirdo shows up out of nowhere and force greets the player (3 times thanks to said dialog system) and  mentions ghouls weirdly don't require food to survive! (You of course get force greeted whether hidden or invisible! Was sneaking in that stealth suit at the time! ) Wow! That's some interesting new lore! Except... for the ghoul settlement in the north. Or Goodneighbor. Or most of the rest of the game. To say nothing of EVERY. SINGLE. OTHER. FALLOUT.

But let's assume it's just ghouls in this area! So I move my way south and there's an adult ghoul holed up in a vault. Makes sense I think, because ghouls here don't need food! Only... she tells you she survived thanks to an abundance of food left in the vault.

..... 

I think toddlers would come up with better writing.

[endgameaddiction]

 

 

[endgameaddiction]

 

He was wrong then as he is now. Go figure...

[Nessa]

22 minutes ago, endgameaddiction said:

 

He was wrong then as he is now. Go figure...

Wow. He was an ass then too.

[bjornk]

Bethesda: Let's make the Falmer totally blind!
Bethesda: Let's also give them bows and arrows...

*Falmer cannot detect the player even when the distance between them is less than a meter*
*Falmer can hit the player in the head with a bow from hundred meters away*

Fanboy: Makes sense.

 

[bjornk]

Now, you might be wondering what else they could possibly "woke-ify", after introducing "dark elves" (imported from Africa) in Amazon's new LoTR, or the new Foundation series with gender swapped characters in a melanin-rich universe all in the name of forced "diversity", well, here's your answer...

 

Spoiler

Behold the black Targayens/Velaryons with platinum hair... in HBO's new Game of Thrones series... As usual, a shitty but popular tv series becomes even shittier in a not-at-all surprising way...

 

It'd be a shame if it doesn't feature genderfluid dragons...

Edited October 6, 2021 by bjornk

[endgameaddiction]

Australia is done for.

[Alkpaz]

"photo check-in process" sounds like the same exact process they had in that COVID-23 flick. Of course they took the social distancing and term "new normal" from another flu-outbreak movie/series "Containment" with Claudia Black (Farscape). So it shouldn't surprise me. 

 

Edited October 6, 2021 by Alkpaz

[Nessa]

China bans ugly female characters! (And pretty much every other thing in games. )

Spoiler

 

[Nessa]

18 hours ago, endgameaddiction said:

Australia is done for.

OK...  so they send a message and you have to respond in 5 minutes. I can already think of several things I do every day that take a hell of a lot longer than 5 minutes and all of them have no phone in the vicinity. No I'm not taking a shower with my phone. No, I'm not taking the phone anywhere near a bathroom period. My phone stays in my office, so if I'm reading a book in my room authoritarians are #(*&$ out of luck. Moreover I turn off the phone whenever it's time for a movie or gaming.

Good thing I'm not in Australia or I'd be grabbing the first boat out of LaLa land.

[vancleef]

Quote

Good thing I'm not in Australia

Wonder if this would happen if their citizens were allowed to own firearms...

[endgameaddiction]

43 minutes ago, vancleef said:

Wonder if this would happen if their citizens were allowed to own firearms...

Or if they hadn't given up their firearms.

[Nessa]

2 hours ago, vancleef said:

Wonder if this would happen if their citizens were allowed to own firearms...

Yeah that's my first reaction too but then I thought.... what about Afghanistan? The "mighty US military" got their *#$ handed to them on their way out by a bunch of morons that don't even know how to use a gym let alone hit anything with a gun.

That led me to three conclusions.

• The sci-fi films/books where a ragtag garbage tech native population kicks out a much more advanced alien civilization aren't as far fetched as I thought.
• When you don't have a gun (or whatever military tech), improvise... until your enemy just leaves and then you can get all their stuff.
• The US is over.

[Alkpaz]

12 minutes ago, Nessa said:

Yeah that's my first reaction too but then I thought.... what about Afghanistan? The "mighty US military" got their *#$ handed to them on their way out by a bunch of morons that don't even know how to use a gym let alone hit anything with a gun.

That led me to three conclusions.

• The sci-fi films/books where a ragtag garbage tech native population kicks out a much more advanced alien civilization aren't as far fetched as I thought.
• When you don't have a gun (or whatever military tech), improvise... until your enemy just leaves and then you can get all their stuff.
• The US is over.

The same culture of people who held off the invading USSR by using hit/run tactics and hiding in the mountains. Why didn't the US win Vietnam? Because of the same thing. The NVC used citizens to carry out suicide killings and guerrilla warfare tactics, defeating the mighty US military. In the end those same type of tactics were used that lead to the fall of Rome ("The barbarian hordes"). 

[Nessa]

2 hours ago, Alkpaz said:

The same culture of people who held off the invading USSR by using hit/run tactics and hiding in the mountains. Why didn't the US win Vietnam? Because of the same thing. The NVC used citizens to carry out suicide killings and guerrilla warfare tactics, defeating the mighty US military. In the end those same type of tactics were used that lead to the fall of Rome ("The barbarian hordes"). 

On the plus side, I guess we don't have to worry as much about alien invasion.